#34 - Full Transparency
Ostracised, nobody cares, and ego
Transparency- a tricky thing in the internet age.
We live in an opaque world. People are complicated. Social dynamics are riddled with emotions and misunderstandings. Why is transparent so tough?
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Ostracised
Transparency seems to go against our every nature. It’s frightening. There’s good reason for this: it plays to our fears of being ostracised from the tribe.
For thousands of years the support of the tribe was crucial to human survival. The hunter gatherer tribe consisted of up to 150 people where everyone knew each other and reputation was everything. As a result we’re hard wired to really care what others think of us.
In a 150 person tribe this works well. Today, however, we’re living a multi-billion person tribe, connected through the internet. With 150 people you can get your head around the group dynamic and build an understanding with your fellow tribe members. But on the internet? Who knows who’s watching?
Today it’s frightening sharing our true selves online because it’s impossible to predict how we’ll be received. No one has a problem sharing news of their promotion or pictures from their expensive holiday to the Caribbean- but weaknesses and insecurities? Forget it.
Nobody Cares
Whilst we can’t judge the room like we could in our tribal days, there is some good news: it doesn’t matter. Back then being ostracised from the tribe truly was life and death. But today? Not so much. If Jill from Utah doesn’t like agree with you, who cares? Life goes on. We no longer need to please the wider tribe to survive.
The even better news: nobody cares! Really. Jill’s not bothered how you’re feeling. She’s too busy worrying about Jill.
If nobody cares.. Why bother? Why be transparent? Well, it’s for your own benefit.
Ego
I’ve been trying my hand at transparency in recent times. This newsletter is an effort in that direction, as is a recent article about the “10 ways I f**ked up fundraising”. I’m starting to get the hang of it but still have a long way to go. It’s like training a muscle.
This week as I sat down with the wonderful Ed Little for his Young People Doing Things podcast (listen here). He, having read the Linkedin post, asked why transparency is important, a question that had not crossed my mind. After some pondering I’ve come to the conclusion it’s all about controlling the ego.
So many of life’s issues stem from our own ego. Everything from toxic corporate cultures to falling out with a friend. It’s certainly something worth working on.
Transparency works because it’s humbling. It takes a lot to admit our flaws and share them with the world. Doing so is a reminder that we’re not so perfect after all- an easy thing to forget.
I’ll endeavour to continue exploring transparency on the internet. Since I’ve started I found the whole experience strangely empowering. My ego is by no means extinguished but day by day I’m learning to take myself a little less seriously, and have some fun along the way.
My Week in Books📚
Billion Dollar Loser by Reeves Wiedeman
The WeWork story- wild. Such a thrill to read. Also, a super interesting case study (and cautionary tale) for us at Unplugged. Thoroughly enjoyed.
Five Temptations of CEO by Patrick M. Lencioni
Recommended to me by a been there and done it entrepreneur. A very easy, read. It’s all about being vulnerable.I shall turn to this again as we grow.
I’ll be updating the books I’ve read this year here. Any recommendations? Let me know!
A Final Thought 💡
“A lack of transparency results in distrust and a deep sense of insecurity.”
- Dalai Lama
That quote 😍🤌🏼