#134 - Bad People
Gori, death row, and Gandhi
Here’s a controversial opinion:
I don’t believe there are bad people.
People do bad things, sure. But does that make them bad people?
Not for me.
Welcome! If you’re reading this but haven’t subscribed you can do here:
Gori
It’s controversial when you take the extreme.
Take Joseph Stalin say- one of history’s greatest villains.
Stalin was responsible for the death of millions. He ruthlessly led the USSR through the Second World War, with little regard for human life.
But the real horror came during his Great Terror. Two years between 1936 and 1938 in which an estimated million people were executed, with millions more sent to gulags.
As a person he was paranoid, ruthless, and devoid of empathy.
A nailed on case for a bad person, surely?
Not so fast.
Stalin had an incredibly difficult childhood.
He grew up in extreme poverty; in a town called Gori, known for its violence and lawlessness; he was regularly involved in street brawls.
His father was an alcoholic and terribly abused Joseph and his Mother.
Aged 7 he developed smallpox leaving his face permanently scared; aged 12 he was struck by a carriage damaging his left arm, leaving it shorter than his right for life.
He entered adulthood deeply psychologically and physically damaged.
Does that excuse any of what he did? Absolutely not.
But does that make him a bad person? Here, I suspect, is where we disagree.
You see, labelling someone a bad person is a judgement.
I have two issues with that: 1) You remove all nuance. Everything is black and white. Yet life is not. And 2) what you’re really saying they’re a worse person than you and your people.
Death Row
So, am I a better person than Joseph Stalin?
Well, I had a far easier childhood; in every dimension. I suffered none of the trauma he did.
Who knows how I would have dealt with what he did?
Would I spend my days writing newsletters about compassion and humility? Certainly not.
There’s a reason people do bad things. It comes from somewhere. And it does not, in my humble opinion, make them lesser people.
Did you know, for example, that 75% of people on Death Row in Texas experienced childhood abuse?
Others suffered childhood damage to their pre-frontal cortex; which is literally where the brain reasons. From childhood their ability to reason was impaired. Hardly surprising they ended up where they did.
Of course, there’s no right answer here.
It’s down to each of us. “Bad” is a construct for us to use as we see fit.
For me it’s not a useful construct.
Gandhi
I subscribe to the philosophy of another of the 20th century’s defining figures: Mahatma Gandhi and his theories of non-judgement and unconditional love.
Gandhi’s focus was on self-purification rather than the judging of others. He spoke of understanding motives rather than condemning actions.
Isn’t that wonderful?
Imagine if we spent half the time understanding why someone did what they did rather than condemning them. He recognised people often acted out of ignorance, fear, or compulsion.
Truly understanding someone’s struggles leads to compassion and tolerance.
A nicer way of being: Approaching the world looking for a reason to love someone, rather than a reason to hate them.
And I’ll be honest: My motives are selfish. Selfish because it’s a better way to live. Smile at the world and the world will smile back.
The trouble is it’s not just the Joseph Stalin’s we like to label as “bad”. It’s the friend who let us down, the challenging colleague, the unfriendly neighbour.
But with each of them, too, there’s a reason. Something has driven that behaviour. What if you looked for that?
I suspect you’d find that they’re just another human too.
Who, just like you, is dealing with life as best they know how. And maybe, just maybe, you can learn to love even them.
Good luck. ❤️🙏
What I’ve Been Reading 📚
The Razor’s Edge by W. Somerset Maugham
Such a wonderful book. It follows the lives of a number of characters, each searching for something different in life. It’s beautifully written with the author himself dipping in and out of their lives. Loved it.
Thank you Hec A for the recommendation!
The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemmingway
A short read and engaging tale. Enjoyable but not life changing.
A Final Thought 💡
“It is unconditional compassion for ourselves that leads naturally to unconditional compassion for others.”
- Pema Chödrön
To me, this isn’t controversial. People often wonder how, say, spiritual teachers engage in financial or sexual abuse, or how famous entrepreneurs can be both geniuses and criminals… Well, life isn’t ever black and white. Doesn’t mean that Stalin and Gandhi are equal either, though!